I Have The Feeling My Emotion Are Being Played


Today was a normal day. Nothing really new happened. I worked on Literature for a matter of 7 minutes, and then moved on to my GUM Unit Assessment test. I actually got nervous doing it. So, I went onto Science. Which took only like 32 minutes, oddly. I moved on to Social Studies and did two lessons to go back on track with it, because my computer got delayed for some reason, so I couldn’t work on Social Studies. I just wonder how I’m going to do when I have to finish my 3 lessons, because I couldn’t do a lesson, and then I missed a lesson. So I was in a tight position.

Once my mom got bored and wasn’t busy, I went to her and asked her to help me with Math. Unfortunately, we had to go to the store to get a compass. For some reason I hardly care what my mom’s picking out of the store. So, when we got back home, I was surprised what I got: a metal compass, with a needle, plus a pencil graphite stuck to the end, and another old compass regular people would use, plus, a weird ruler that had on top of it a mini protractor. Way to go think inventors. 😀 I did my Geometry lesson, and it turned awkward, than thrilling, than boring, then exciting, then irritating. I couldn’t make a final decision toward the lesson. But, at the end I overcame it and I actually became to like Geometry very much.

It’s like Math was playing my emotions. I don’t get it. Anyways, next lesson was from another unit. The unit was more about reviewing what we remember from last year’s math. Today I had to work on Fractions and Multiples. Now, besides the fact that it’s easy, it’s really helpful to go on a review, because when I heard the word factors, I freaked because I thought I had to go into a hell of a lot of fractions. I hate fractions, that’s the bottom line. I had to do just ONE MORE lesson. I ahd to study on Square Roots and Prime Numbers. Man, how easy can Math get. If it was hard, anyways, I would know that for a fact I had to like it somehow, because I wanted to become an electrical engineer (if you check my wishlist.). So yeah, no turning back.

The rest of the day got boring so it came to a boring pause… and then went again. I worked on my portfolio for a few minutes to study. And then went to sleep.

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School’s Corrupting My Daily Schedule/Enjoyment


Well, yeah, I have been realizing getting involved with a lot of fights recently with Nayyir, and I’m getting pretty tired of it. Sometimes, and I’m ONLY saying sometimes, a part in my head regrets knowing Nayyir. Well, I try ignoring that more often. Anyways, today you won’t believe what happened. It was all so… I don’t, uncharacteristically? Today I got in Science class 3 minutes early, which was really bad, because then I would’ve lost my opportunity to chat so much with Nayyir, Elizabeth (if she ever entered around the 9), and “the unknown girl”. Damn. Someday, I’m going to have to say her name once. Anyways, my teacher, Dr. Brad Johnson (Dr. Johnson) was acting as usual. Feeling at the same time weird, yet enthusiastic. He finally at the end of class chat for about 7 to 6 minutes tops (like he usually does 🙂 )

“the unknown girl” chatted with me for awhile, so we chatted for about all our time. Finally I had to move on to Social Studies, unfortunately, I came 2 minutes late. Luckily, the room didn’t lock, because our strict, Social Studies teacher says that whenever kids come into the class late, she doesn’t want to have to review them to make sure they stay on track. So, she decides to lock classes. The most uncharacteristically she did today was rude. When I was raising my hand in a crowd of about 40 to 50 people (because there was about 200 kids in the class), I came to a point where I was around the 5th spot, and she removed my hand. Seriously? She fucking put my hand down? I got so pissed I started asking her if she MEANT TO put my hand down, unfortunately, she ignored me. I’m just happy the class is switching teachers, because the only teacher I suppose to like is my Science teacher.

My Math teacher, Ms. Harper, is sassy. My Social Studies teacher, Adrienne Rhoads (she prefers the class to call her that), was rude, and well… my English teacher Ms. Montgomery, no offense Nayyir, is both. It’s like I hate all my teachers. What the hell is wrong with me? I finished the class easily, because all we studied on, were these 4 circles in different sizes that represents the federal’s or president/government’s power. Even some 6th graders spelled federal wrong. Lol. When I continued with my work on my plan, I finished both, my reading lesson, and my GUM Unit review. Wonder how my results are going to turn out. 😀 Afterwards, I went on to Math, and guess what? The class was locked. I opened my eyes in amazement. I tried it twice and it didn’t work. I had to wait for about 21 minutes for it to lock open. So, yeah, I was 21 minutes late. Damn me.

Soon after that, I worked on my portfolio more. Remember how I said I finished 1 1/2 paragraphs? Well, I finally finished the rest of my second paragraph, and did another full paragraph. I’m still wondering how I’m going to finish when I need to write 5 paragraphs down, edit them, and then type my final draft down due October 25th. See, I can do it. But, this was really a late time to do it. So, I hope I can finish the rest tomorrow. I took about an hour and a half to finish paragraphing. I had a test on Reading, and turns out the lesson cheated on me, so I failed. I got angry for a few moments, then cooled, and had some Ginger Ale. Lol. I’m supposed to finish 5 tests by October 25th as well. WOW, torture, torture, torture. I can’t remember the rest, oh yeah, my school part got corrupted so I couldn’t finish Social Studies and Math in time. Damn, I’m in a tough position.

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Finally Started On My Portfolio


Well, I’m going to skip today’s detail for this post, because I feel so excited to write more on my portfolio. But, here’s just some details that happened: I had to study Social Studies for about half and hour because I had to study on Venezuela. The only interesting part of studying it, was the fact that I got to finally study it for the first time in 6th grade, with the Groiler’s Encyclopedia. Their facts make it more interesting for me. So, I got a good full result and went on to the next subject. The portfolio was still constantly in my head. I knew I had to do it somehow. Oh and then, while thinking about that, I did my Unit Assessment test for Math. It took only 30 minutes to finish, but it felt like an hour trying to remember all the formulas of the circumference, diameter and radius. I got a good 90%, and my mom felt happy about it. Though, this one question she helped me on, turned out to be a wrong answer.

But, I barely cared. Anabelle was running around the house like CRAZY. So, when afternoon came I chatted for a little while with “the unknown girl”. Then, I went straight to finally turning into boredom. Uh… I was bored so, I decided to work on my portfolio. I started getting serious with my work, unfortuantely, I didn’t know what a thesis statement was in this category of essay. So, I called up Nayyir and asked him, since he said he finished his. Well, I acknowledged two things after the call. 1. I knew how to write a thesis statement. 2. He was lying about finishing his. He’s still working it. Well, I jotted down my first paragraph for introduction and seemed to impress my mom because I never worked with a portfolio, besides in the 5th grade, without any help of my parents. I continued on to the second paragraph. I only got halfway. But, it worked didn’t it? I finally had to end up taking a nap. And then actually falling asleep.

Oh My God What Was I Thinking?!


Well, today was uh… pretty un-normal I guess for me. It just felt really awkward. Anyway, today I was studying on 20,000 leagues under the sea, for about 2 hours, I guess because I was taking notes all day long. Lol. It was meaningless. I knew the whole story by heart, and NOW, my brain starts thinking about taking notes? That’s just… ugh. Whatever, I had a test on Study Island. It was a review on the the Geological Process. Uh… hello?! I just completed that damn test a few days ago, and now I’m expect to review? Wow that’s just swell. I again got another 98.32% for my result and went on with the rest of my subjects. I had to work on the Geometric Figures today, and I didn’t want to go back to that. Plus, I don’t even have a compass to begin with.

I skipped it. So, I went directly to Social Studies. Man, that’s like the only subject besides Math that I work most on. I always have the tendencies to write down a lot of notes just to keep up with the work and decide to make my work harder. Well, I decided to skip noting down everything for today’s lesson. Unfortunately, today was a REALLY GOOD lesson that would’ve been a good idea to note down. Ah, the irony. I had to study on Columbia, Chile and Venezuela. I was able to pass it with a 100%, yeah, but I felt guilty for not taking notes on this one. I went throughout Earth Science, which was like easy. I don’t want to get into details, right now for it. Once I finished the rest of my school, my mom noticed I hadn’t done any Math, so that was a big, major no no for my mom. So, she asked what else I had besides the lesson currently on. I just had to do a Unit review, and that’s it. :O Seriously?

Anyways, when I left with my dad to go to Aldi and get food, the portfolio sheet I had to write, due October 25, was constantly ringing in my mind. I tried to focus and be happy with my dad. But, how the HELL am I supposed to be happy when almost EVERYBODY IN my school has finished their portfolio last week and I haven’t even started my thesis statement. Damn me. We went to Super H Mart afterwards, got food, and went home. My dad went from an enthusiastic attitude, into the sharp and snappy kind. No offense dad. 😀 Later on, we did Quiet Time, which became very boring than usual. Sorry. Oh and I got yelled at today in front of my dad by my mom. Now whenever that happens, my dad always tries to make me look me feel even worse, even though it’s not even his situation. BTW, my mom act sometimes like a freak, trying to yell at me to get me to think like her.

Well, I discussed about that with my dad. Weird. And he told me, that my mom is not always how I want her to be. That made me think. But, I already went to sleep. 😆

And I Still Get A Minutia Percentage Of Respect


Now, what do we all want? Food. Water. Probably electronics. But, what most people want, is friends, family and other people to respect them. Isn’t that our greatest need for most of the people living on this planet? Yes, it is calculated as a 100% correct theory. But, that little percent that doesn’t want respect expands more and more by the anti-socialism caused by the other people around them. You can’t blame yourselves, that’d be too easy. What you mostly have to blame are the people around you, the people who make you depressed, the people who make you angry, the people who try so hard to make your life miserable. I guess you’ve been to that stage because most of you are older than me. Right? Well, I’m going to go through a little story about what happened today. Okay? And BTW, sorry for the proverb, lol, I just felt the need to write it down.

Well, today was a Sunday, and usually on a Sunday, you go to church. Unfortunately, I woke up around 8:26 am and nobody was awake besides me. Weird. Not even my aunt who wakes up ALWAYS (whenever she sleepovers) early, was awake (Oh and I may have not mentioned, but my aunt was sleeping over at our house). So, I paced steadily downstairs and went to the computer. See, computer time around 8 in the morning, on a Sunday is kind of prohibited in our family, even though it doesn’t make sense. When my aunt finally woke up she came downstairs. I didn’t really duck-and-cover really, because my aunt doesn’t really know, or doesn’t pay attention to our rule that we’re not allowed to use the computer on Sundays. So, I just typed around on the computer and just said hi to my aunt. Later on, my parents woke up, telling me that I was going to have to go to the 11 o’clock service for church.

Damn. I hate that service. Everybody that goes there always looks weird, speaks bad language or just looks un-normal, which yeah, I did look un-normal today, so yeah, hardly matters. When I arrived at church, I was too afraid to look at anyone. Girls about the age of 15 would stare at me about 4 times per 5 seconds. Luckily, I was able to pass through and get to my group. When I arrived in the Cabin, I went to the game room (it’s basically this room a story above the stage where the rockers play, where you play foozeball and pool until service starts [hardly any girls stay over, because they have this other policy to stay on the first floor and talk about glittery stuff]). I didn’t find anybody I knew, besides my friend August. I ignored him playing, because he was playing pool, and I don’t think it’s that interesting. I went to the foozeball table and found some very competitive players. I was able to beat 7 teams with a 2 ball, and a 3 ball. The 1 ball was so impossible because it moved so fast and it was hard not focusing on one thing.

So, I tried winning, but I lost. One of the players on my team kept repeating: “shit! Shit! Shit!”. See, that’s why kids aren’t really influenced well in our church around the 11 service. Unfortunately, the stage already started, so I ran quickly downstairs. Occassionally, the band players would play songs for the crowd that were more from bands like Mike Posner, Justin Bieber and so on. But, they didn’t. So, yeah. When the preaching started, I was so amazed, because the speaker was so interesting. He mentioned all these different scientific facts, that made it so interesting, I couldn’t take my eyes off the speaker. Unfortunately, when everybody went to group, I had to stay with the loners. I didn’t have a group in the 11 service. So, I had to stay in a seat meaninglessly for an hour and a half, until I had to leave.

I’m going to skip the minuscule details after I left. When I was in the middle of trying to befriend Patricia’s friend, Kerry, Terry, Marvin and this other girl called Alexis, who I may have mentioned early in my old posts. Terry just came showing off and giving his weird grin. Hey, I can’t judge that about him because first of all, he’s older than me by a year, second of all, he’s way taller than me. Sometimes, I have this feeling that I’m stronger than him because whenever he pushes me around I’m always good at defending. Kerry was cursing most of the time and criticizing me. Marvin… eh… I can’t say too much about him, besides the fact that he walks around a lot. See, Kerry just loves to find problems with me constantly. I don’t know why. What did I do to them? When I started laying on a car, cursing, Alexis asked me to ask a question. So I said “Is Kerry and Terry gay?”. Alexis really liked that question. But, Kerry found out some way to try to make me look like a bitch. Sometimes I just really hate that asshole. Sorry for swearing.

Hormones are growing more into me, so I’m starting curse more often now. Lol. Afterwards, I had a gun war, everybody was outside, watching as Terry, Kerry, Marvin, another neighbor called Nicholous and I were torturing each other. Seriously, it was brutal. I got shot three times. And Terry got shot 5 times as well as Kerry because of Nicholous shooting them. I really hate those guys. I just realized. And then when I asked Kerry why he hated me so much, he just made me look like a fool again. So, I gave up on him and went inside to fall asleep.